I Miss You....

She finally can online at her home, and I saw her personal message just now, saying that "If u wants to hate me, go ahead, I know it will feel better" but I can tell you this, it won't make me feel better, because I can't live my life with happiness without you.

Today, my mom reminds me something again, the sweetest soup that I ever drank for my whole life, the soup that cook by HER, how my mom reminds me on that?I asked her this afternoon, whats soup she cook for dinner, she replied "Neh, that soup that you said very sweet one leh" -.-'' mom, thanks for that, I remember that few months back, she promised me that she will cook me 3meals and 1 soup, maybe she's kinda busy, she didn't cook for me.

When I was blogging bout this, a song remind me that I use some of the words to comfort her when she needs some comfort from me last time, the song name is "It's all because of you" by 98 degrees, "your my sunshine after the rain, you're the cure againts I feeling my pain, I'm loosing my mind when you're not around, it's all because of you" I'm loosing my mind right now.

If I'm not mistaken, last time during those cooling period, she will write down some notes on her hp, that how she feels and so on, I don't know whether she's still doing now or not, I really wish to read some if she do have, normally my phone 2days gota charge 1 times, now, 4days only need to charge, because no more hardcore sms with her anymore.

I don't know what I wants, I suddenly feels that I really need her, I want to hug her, I want her back. I browse to her friendster profile today, saw some of her pix with her college mates, guess she's happy with her life right now, I really miss her.

My sis asked me today, don't you felt sad or not worth just breaking up like this, I told her I don't wish to, but I forced to do so, she said I like very happy for breaking up with her like that, but who knows how I feel?I act like normal because I don't want people to worry bout me, I do cry everyday, cry out loud in my heart.

Last Thursday, Kien Hor said he saw me in the class, with cool and sad face, asked me how am I, I thought no one knows that I sad everydays, I told him, I brokeup with Siew Yan, he don't believed, he thought I was fooling with him, in the end, he believed because he know I really sad.

Previously, I blog that if people asked me that whether I will get back with her or not if she beg to get back together, I guess I'll answer yes, I'll, because I can't stop thinkin of her every single minutes, if she's here, I confirm I'll hug her tight and tell her that I mis her.....